Bridesmaid supported for wearing white dress at ‘angry’ sister’s wedding

Internet commentators behind a 28-year-old woman who wore a white dress to her sister’s wedding despite being told not to.

In a viral Reddit post published on the r/AmITeA**hole forums, Redditor u/obvvsttuct (aka the original poster or OP) said she was honored to serve as a bridesmaid, but revealed how indecisive and lack of financial resources left her to the wrath of her sister.

Captioned: “[Am I the a**hole] because I’m wearing a white dress to my sister’s wedding?” the post has garnered nearly 8,000 upvotes and 1,500 comments since Oct. 14.

“For months my sister has been planning her wedding,” OP began. “I was one of her bridesmaids.”

The original poster went on to explain that her sister refused to pay for dresses for her bridal shower, saying her refusal was accompanied by an odd request: that bridesmaids should wear white.

The original poster also said she bought a white dress for the wedding and spent more than $1,700 before her sister changed her mind.

“I really care about my sister so I put a lot of thought and time into choosing my dress hoping it would be ok for her wedding,” OP wrote. “I found this beautiful lace corset, long white dress…[for] around £1500 and the boutique had no right of return.

“My sister was overjoyed. She exclaimed that she LOVED the dress…[but] a week before the wedding…I wake up to texts and calls from my sister,” OP continued. “I open my sister’s messages and I see, ‘Change of plans, I don’t want bridesmaids in white. White is for the bride and all other bridesmaids are now wearing teal.”

“My heart literally sank, I didn’t have enough money to buy another dress…I let my sister and family know this and attended the wedding,” OP added. “Everyone glared and glared at me, especially the groom. My sister was angry with me afterwards and my whole family ignores me.”

Wearing white to a wedding can be risky.

With the exception of weddings, where all guests and members of the wedding party must be dressed alike, white is usually reserved for the bride.

Anyone else wearing it will likely stand out and, more importantly, steal some of the thunder from the bride – which will surely cause trouble.

“It’s standard etiquette for women not to wear the color white as a wedding guest,” said Alexis Eliopoulos O’Mara, wedding consultant and owner of Unique Weddings by Alexis news week.

“The bride usually wants to enjoy being the only one in white on her wedding day,” added Eliopoulos O’Mara.

Last year, the average cost of a new wedding dress in the United States was $1,800, according to The Knot’s 2021 Real Weddings Survey.

The Knot also reported that dresses worn by bride and groom members cost around $130 per person, which is a big difference between bride and bridesmaid.

However, in the viral Reddit post, the original poster said she spent more than $1,700 on a bridesmaid dress and insisted that her sister encourage that purchase, even going so far as to say that the dress was “perfect” for her wedding would be.

Sisters in a dead end over wedding dresses
Sisters in a dead end over wedding dresses. Members of Reddit’s r/AmITeA**hole forum defended a woman who wore an expensive white dress to her sister’s wedding.
shironosov/iStock/Getty Images Plus

Throughout the comments section of the viral post, many Redditors criticized this encouraging behavior and speculated that the original poster was shamelessly put up.

“The whole ‘only bride wears white’ thing goes out the window when the bride specifically says you should buy the white dress for her wedding,” wrote Redditor u/Certified_freshk in the top comment of the post, which has more than 15,000 upvotes had received.

“Your sister sucks,” they continued. “If she wants you to wear a teal dress, that’s fine as long as she reimburses you for the white one.”

Redditor u/HunterDangerous1366, whose comment received almost 6,000 upvotes, offered a more investigative perspective.

“Your sister made you fail here,” they wrote. “She saw you spend £1500 on a dress afterwards [okay-ing] it and to look at it.

“I guess she didn’t want you in her wedding reception? [Or] Maybe you looked too good in that dress? Maybe she was jealous,” they added. “Who knows, but she got you dirty here.”

“Your sister is ridiculous,” interjected Redditor u/mdsnbelle. “Who the hell changes the whole color scheme a week before the wedding? Your sister either doomed you…or she really is a freak.”

news week asked u/obvvsttuct for a comment. We have not been able to verify the details of the case.

Has a marriage come between your relationship with a loved one? Let us know at We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek. Bridesmaid supported for wearing white dress at ‘angry’ sister’s wedding

Rick Schindler

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