A video claiming to show a woman and her boyfriend on a “breakaway weekend” has divided opinion. Some are praising the couple for finding a mature and heartfelt way to end things, while others have called it their worst nightmare.
In a clip shared by tovahparpar on TikTok, a man and woman can be seen lying in bed holding hands while an on-screen caption explains that they are “breaking up in two weeks” but their breakup was preceded by a brief trip together are to think about the good times.
The clip, which has been viewed 3.9 million times, sparked a huge debate online and can be viewed here.
There is no easy way to end a relationship, but there is definitely a right way to do it. According to New York psychologist Loren Soeiro, it’s important to “consolidate positive memories of the relationship as you move forward in life.”
“You’re going to want to accept the reasons why the relationship didn’t work out while retaining the ability to look back on it with warmth,” he told Psychology Today. “The person you are breaking up with deserves the same and needs to experience the breakup in a way that doesn’t overwhelm their good memories.”
Soeiro believes it’s crucial to “acknowledge the parts of the relationship that were good and validate those experiences” in a way that helps minimize the pain that comes with ending things.
That certainly seems to be the intention of the couple starring in the viral clip.
As the accompanying caption explains, they spent four hours “cuddling” while “reminiscing” about their time together.
“We spoke about all of our fears, our healing plans, and our hopes for our future,” the caption continued. “It was heartbreaking and healing at the same time.”
But while the couple seemed to have benefited from the trip together, many on social media seemed unhappy with the idea.
“That would be psychologically traumatizing for me,” smfhalec wrote, and eva.walters22 agreed, “Can’t think of anything worse.”
Christin Grace Goddard felt they were “only prolonging the pain,” while hayyzzeerr said, “I would cry hysterically every second when I saw him if I knew we were breaking up in two weeks.” Beatlesfannumber1_ added added: “For me that would be even worse than a normal breakup.”
Despite the backlash, many saw credit in the couple’s approach, and some even admitted to doing similar things.
As Courtney Bowden put it, “Sometimes a breakup isn’t a crisis, sometimes it’s two people loving each other realizing that there’s something non-negotiable that means they’re not together forever.”
Markiboy171 felt it was a “mature and considerate” way to end a relationship, while Kindyl wrote, “Feel bad for the people who don’t get it, sometimes the best is the hardest.”
“I had a breakup that was like this,” sydneylea_ commented. “We loved each other very much but knew we wouldn’t work long term because I want kids and he doesn’t.”
news week asked tovahparpar for a comment.
Have you noticed any red flags that made you want to end a relationship? Let us know at email@example.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.
https://www.newsweek.com/couple-breakup-weekend-away-prolonging-pain-1746978 Couple’s breakup weekend divides opinion: ‘Prolonging the pain’