“FBoy Island” Season 3 brings back our most notorious FBoys

This post contains spoilers for FBoy Island Season 3, Episodes 1 and 2.

FBoy Island may have moved to the CW, but based on the first two episodes of the third release, nothing has changed at Bro Chateau. In fact, previews of the upcoming episodes show that one of the series’ most popular yet infamous characters will soon return. Friends, are we ready for more of Danny Louisa, the “Italian Stallion” from Season 2? What about Mercedes Knox from the same season – the clever FBoy who stole Louisa’s heart?

For the uninitiated, the rules of apply FBoy Island are simple: three women make their way through a group of 21 men, and while some of them describe themselves as “nice guys” who have agreed to split the $100,000 prize money, the others are proud ” FBoys” who… Maybe you’ll just take the money and run.

This season we’re following 20-year-old Brooklyn model Hali Okeowo, influencer and former competitive snowboarder Daniella Grace, 33, and Katie Thurston, 32 – who apparently did it turned to comedy after her turn as ABC’s Bachelorette. They all hope to find true love, but if they’re not careful, they’ll end up saying goodbye to a lot of money.

The first two episodes of Season 3 premiered Monday night on the CW and contain mostly the same shenanigans as always: lots of talk about “red flags,” lots of barely buttoned button-down shirts, and an absurd amount of peacocking. We have a 22-year-old posing as a 25-year-old, a hip yoga instructor from Santa Monica who never seems to talk to the women but instead chooses to “stay quietly wise,” and a nice guy named Dio who doesn’t can stop smiling even when he goes home the first night.

To kick things off, our brave host Nikki Glaser asked the guys to introduce themselves so each of the women could decide based on their first impression whether she wanted to give them a green or red flag. Those with three green flags were given extra time at the evening cocktail mix – a big advantage considering the first round of eliminations takes place on the first evening. Bryce G., Marco D., Elijah D., Jared A. and Vince X. received unanimous consent.

…And yet at the end of Episode 2, three of these guys were on the chopping block. That’s how it is sometimes on the island!

But before we delve into who the unfortunate gentlemen might have been (and how they screwed things up so quickly), let’s first turn our attention to a few frontrunners. First up is Vince, a 31-year-old lawyer who appeared on Prime Video’s dating show The one that got away last year. Of course, he and Bachelor-Verse alum Katie had a lot to say, and his easy-going, charming demeanor (and excellent taste in bucket hats) seemed to have won her over. Hali’s attention seems to be split between Elijah and Evander C., and although she drops Evander into her bottom two spots at the first elimination ceremony to test his reaction, he passes with flying colors. (At least he gets the first kiss of the season with her at the end – a sacred distinction, to be sure.)

And then there’s Daniella, who readily admits that she tends to fall for FBoys and does just that. Still, she had to try The FBoy?!

We’ve seen a lot of overly proud tools on this show, but Jared might make the most of it. He has the same confidence and scheming as Mercedes, a central villain from last season, and to top it off, he seems to engage in power plays. He deliberately takes Katie away from Marco while the two are having a drink, seemingly for no other reason than to upset Marco, and when Daniella later asks him about his rancid reputation, he storms into a room where all the boys are sitting around a huge scene close. (By this point he had already blown his chances with Daniella, who stormed out of their conversation, muttering under her breath, “cocky bastard.”)

“I definitely think I have the ability to outsmart these women,” Jared says in a confessional interview at the end of Episode 2, confirming that he is indeed an FBoy. “The chance that any of these girls can make me choose them over money is absolutely zero percent.”

Yuck – but is this all just an act designed to make us nervous, like Mercedes in season 2? He also seemed pretty sleazy, but in the end he decided to split the money with the leading lady, Louise Barnard. Let’s hope Daniella keeps both eyes open this season, because Jared is a shark and he at least thinks he smells buddy in the water.

With a few loud exceptions like Jared, it’s often hard to tell at the start of a season who’s on which side of the “Nice Guy”/”FBoy” line. This is partly because these labels are self-selecting; Just like in real life, a lot of guys who think they’re “nice guys” turn out to be pretty toxic, while some of the “FBoys” actually seem okay.

The tension between these realities is often greatest during elimination ceremonies. Consider this: On one hand, we have Kris, who was apparently an f-boy and didn’t make much of an effort to get to know the women. As he prepared to exit, he vowed, “I came here as an FBoy, but that doesn’t change my qualities that make me a real human being.” (Huh?) And then on the other side we have people like Bryce – who were eliminated and complained: “I came here as the nicest damn nice guy in the world.” (Hmmm.)

Katie, Hali and Daniella have a lot of work ahead of them and as always on this show, teamwork will be key. Katie is already on Jared’s case and is determined to protect Daniella (even if Hali seems a bit put off by her intervention). So far they’ve sent six boys home: F-Boys Ian M., Shaun P. and Kris T. and nice boys Dio P., Bryce G. and Tanner G.

It’s unclear what caused Katie to send Tanner home, but it’s clear something happened what we didn’t see. Although we never saw the two interact on screen, Katie told Tanner, “I really respect you as a person. It is in your best interest to protect you from this environment of chaos and intensity and let you go.” On the way out, he cried and wondered aloud, “Why do women say they want someone emotional , who is in tune with their feelings?” Unclear what happened there, but we obviously missed something.

Marco made it out this week, but he’s on thin ice after his embarrassing confrontation with Jared.

“You best believe I’m going to take Jared to task for that bastard,” Marco said after the drinking fiasco in the show’s eightieth chatty performance. “I’m not giving in.” Will anyone ever tell these men that women are far more impressed by men who can actually focus their attention on courtship than on chest-thumping in competition? No one? Everything is fine!

Katie made a point of asking Marco out in Episode 2 (a nice appeasing move that she probably learned during her time dealing with male egos). Bachelorette), but it didn’t go as well as Marco had hoped. After their kiss, Katie confessed: “If my mouth was a triangle and his was a square, then the kiss would be kind of like that.” Ouch! But don’t tell Marco that because he’s convinced everything went great.

Marco and the rest of the boys have to take care of themselves in the next few weeks. If the season previews are to be believed, a few franchise graduates are on their way. Towards the end of Episode 2, in the lower third, Marquis is given a description of him as “Mercedes’ little brother” – a strange choice that suddenly makes more sense when he recognizes his brother among the new men in the preview. Also there? Danny – who almost left the island with Mia last season before choosing her reformed FBoy colleague Peter Park instead. “The Gabagool is back at school,” as Daniel put it – but will he actually get the girl this time? If these guys have a say in the matter, he should just do it fuhgeddaboudit.