KIERA Dignam said she had to share her father Christy “in my whole life, and I had to share him in death, which I hated at the time.”
The Crazy World singer passed away on June 13th at the age of 63.
The singer had been receiving palliative treatment after a decade-long battle with amyloidosis, a rare blood disorder.
His daughter has now spoken openly about how she feels after the loss of her beloved father.
Kiera explained: “It’s literally ups and downs every day.
“Some days are, I won’t say, good days, there aren’t really good days, but there are good hours.”
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“Anyone who has ever lost someone will know that it comes in waves and I am still in the numbness phase, which I assumed would last a few weeks.”
“Tomorrow I’ll be about 17 weeks old now.”
Kiera previously said that she had to share her father growing up.
She now said it was difficult to share her father after he sadly passed away.
She explained to Andrea Gilligan on Newstalk: “I’ve said this before, I never want to take anything away from someone else’s loss because a loss is a loss and it’s terrible, but I had the added bonus of everyone knowing who he was was.”
“He was always just the father to me and I’m the only one who knows what that felt like, but at the same time I had to share it.”
“I had to share him in my life and I had to share him in death, which I hated at the time.”
“This might come across as selfish, but I always felt like he was never just mine.”
“When he died I just thought, ‘Okay, close the doors, close the windows, I don’t want anyone to know’.”
“I didn’t want it to be a public thing, I just needed that time for myself and a small family circle.”
However, people found out shortly after Christy’s death and Kiera’s husband Darren Moran began receiving messages.
She continued: “We got a call and within about an hour and a half, my husband Darren got a text from someone saying, ‘I just heard that Christy died. What’s up?’
“So then we had to announce it, and I was hoping to let it wait a few days just to have time to understand what was going on. But I didn’t have that luxury either.”
Before his death, Kiera had to release a statement to prevent rumors from spreading that her father had died.
She explained that she had stopped performing and touring, but went on stage for the first time for a family wedding when she first heard the rumors.
Her father was in hospice at the time and she explained: “The first time I went away was for my cousin’s wedding and in the weeks leading up to the wedding I was scared because I knew I would be singing to her at the wedding would.”
“And I thought, ‘I don’t know if I’m going to be able to do this,’ and obviously we knew my dad couldn’t go, he was at home and it was my dad’s sister’s daughter.
“So when we went to the wedding, I was on stage and we took a break and Darren turned around and said, ‘Kiera, what’s going on?'”
Darren had received over 20 messages from people and Kiera further explained: “I had 30 strange messages.”
“And I thought, ‘What’s going on?’ And Darren called my friend and he said, “What’s going on?” And she was after she was in the pub and said, “The DJ in the pub is after he announced Christy’s death. It’s online.”
She told her mother to stay offline so she wouldn’t get upset before calling her father.
Kiera explained: “I called my dad and said, ‘Listen, I’m just letting you know that it’s online that you’re dead and I’m just double-checking that you’re not’.”
“And he said, ‘No, I’m not,’ and I said, ‘Exactly great.’ So that was kind of a joke we had.”
The Dublin native went on to say that there have been many rumors about her father’s death over the years, but “this time was the only time it really bothered him because it was very real.”
She said: “This time he was in palliative care and it was close to the bone this time.”
“And so I felt like I had to make a statement to say, ‘Please listen, it’s upsetting my family’.”
“I have three children who are online, the youngest is not, the older two are [are].
“Then I had to call my kids and tell them, ‘Listen, if you see something online, don’t worry’.”
“And my oldest son had seen it and asked, ‘What’s going on?’
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“And I said, ‘I don’t know where it’s coming from, but you can call your grandpa if you want, he’s in the house. He’s fine.’
“But I don’t think people really realize that even though you’re in the public eye, you’re a human being, but you’re a person, and they can kind of separate that out if they think you’re just an entity, which they “Don’t do it.” Really understand that you have feelings.