Vanderpump Rules Season 10 finale recap: Sexy Unique Rebound

So how was yours Vanderpump Rules party last night? did you eat pasta Pop some Pumptinis? Grab some mushrooms with Bae and watch the sunrise? There really are no wrong answers. Assuming you watched the episode and the follow-up interview with Ariana Madix You are most welcome at Watch What Happens Live.

Last week, Tom Sandoval yelled at Ariana how much he loves Beyoncé and I’m craving that micro level of delusion from him now. I can’t even believe how deep this bar rat was willing to go to remain ignorant. Just the fact that he still walks the streets with that scrawny-mouthed merkin says enough. Where is humanity?

The episode begins with a flashback Sheana Shay And Rachel Leviss On “Watch What Happens,” her story changed forever that night. If you need a refresher, this is the same night Tom and his karaoke side show performed. Ariana grabbed his phone and found a raunchy video of Tom and Raquel in the camera tape. In his confessional, Tom assures the production that he would have “usually deleted” something like this.

Tom isn’t worth anything and he should know that deep down

Sandoval shuffles across the kitchen, groaning like someone who just squandered his mother’s retirement on fast fashion for goth theater kids. He begins reading his Rolodex the excuses for blowing up Ari’s life. He claims he can’t apologize because every time he and Ariana talk about the affair, she gets angry. Can’t she exercise some self-control?!

Tom’s other excuses include that he and Raquel didn’t have sex for a while after the first time. He says that Raquel treats him with respect and that letting him bang her in a parked vehicle like in Grease builds his confidence. He also says that he wanted to end things two weeks ago, but later had to get back into Ariana’s bed when he was feeling unwell.

Ariana reminded Tom that she’s represented him since he wore skinny jeans Jax Taylors Asshole. She tells him he’s worth nothing and she wants him to know that deep in his heart.

girl power

Sheana And Katie Maloney Get together at Ariana’s home. They haven’t seen each other since then Katie’s Mexico vacation Scheana’s wedding. Ariana tells them all about the FaceTime video and says the affair started right after her friend’s trip and Charlotte’s death.

Scheana begins to cry at the science behind acrylic claws and street fighting. Raquel claims Scheana hit her, but that’s physically impossible given the length of her nails. Katie reports this Tom Schwartz has been hinting at the affair since BravoCon in October. Out of solidarity, they all smash the iconic wooden penis whistle. This concludes the feminist bonding ceremony of our ancestors.

And speaking of foremothers, on walks Kristen Doute. She prescribes Ariana water and electrolytes. They perform a cremation ritual with a BIC lighter on the terrace. A modern take on the penis thing. The curse is lifted. Nature heals before our eyes.

Ariana also pays a visit Lisa Vanderpump. Lisa is stunned to learn that Raquel is so sneaky. How did ken todds Do you miss the informant that piping hot tea? It’s unbelievable.

King James Festivals

James Kennedy lovingly mourns the friendship he thought he had with Tom. He and Ally invite Lala Kent and Katie over to talk about anything. Lala is sure there have been other moments of infidelity. She knows how this works, and she sees that Tom is far too bold to be a first offender. Then she mentioned suspicious behavior he was exhibiting Billie Lee.

James takes it upon himself to call Raquel over the loudspeaker for everyone to hear. Raquel says she feels shit and confirms she and Sandoval are not an official couple. James casually asks what it’s like losing everyone she’s ever loved because of Tom’s “stinky” middle-aged schlong. Raquel replied that it was eye opening. James calls her stupid and congratulates her on her complete failure before hanging up.

black

He doesn’t get any trouble from me. This man plays dead. After some prodding, he finally reveals to Katie that he knew about Sandoval and Raquel’s one-night stand over the summer. He then slips out of the scene by claiming stress. Apparently there are now man-eating alligators in Florida. Let’s all pray that the triplets will always keep their shared cricket phone in one of their cargo pockets.

When Sandoval and Schwartz meet to talk things over, Sandoval begins to sob like an 80’s child actor. Schwartz tells him he’s upset. Your bar gets terrible reviews on Yelp. Sandoval claims he simply couldn’t tell Ariana about it sooner because he “felt” she didn’t want to hear about his affair with her best friend. Big Scooby-Doo energy.

Then Sandoval started pacing and talking about how Ariana’s standards of intimacy forced him to play with himself in the bathroom. He also claimed that if Ariana really wanted to know what he was up to on all those nights he wasn’t home, she could have just followed him. We get it. You like horny stalkers. Taylorarmstrongenough.gif

Schwartz later meets up with Ariana to talk. He tells her that he feels Sandoval took advantage of his kindness. He’s devastated to be portrayed as a co-conspirator in all of this, and he’s sorry. Ariana told him in no uncertain terms that she would not be friends with anyone who was friends with Tom. She starts sobbing and Schwartz just stares away. He’s thinking about those damn crocodiles again.

beatnik era

Tom and Raquel start their scene together with a shot of brown alcohol. This scene gave Celeb Rehab a lot of energy. There was a gloom about it that I can’t put into words, but all I know is that Tom smelled like cigarettes here. And then he accidentally called Raquel “Ariana.” BALD.

We found out that Raquel’s mother hates Tom. Tom refuses to talk about his family, and Raquel seems to stumble over her lines as she remembers it. He saves the moment by telling her he loves her and doing that romantic head cradle thing with his hands. Raquel apologizes for all of this by saying she just wanted to know what it would be like to have physical contact (in the back seat of a car) with someone she loves. She is all alone now. She only has Tom, her parents and her sister.

Later, Tom visits LVP. He has a little panic attack and she tells him he’s not a bad person while chiding his behavior.

Sandoval’s dismissal

It’s real when the founder of Vanderpump Rules says so. And Scheana made it very clear. I believe this could really be the end for Sandoval on the show. On the night of his tom-tom show and Scheana’s fight with Raquel in New York, Tom said some irreversible things to Shi-shu.

The final scene of the show is Tom visiting Scheana’s house to tell her all about his new affair and his “spiritual awakening”. Scheana reminded him that she knew about the Miami girl and suspected there had been other cases of infidelity. Tom admits he cheated on Ariana another time, with someone close to her (according to Ariana on WWHL following this episode). Scheana tells Tom that they aren’t friends anymore and he doesn’t deserve any friends at all. ~fin~

The three-part season 10 reunion of Vanderpump Rules begins Wednesday, May 24 at 9/8 p.m. on Bravo. An extended edition will be streamed after the episode airs on Peacock.

TELL US – Do you think Tom only cheated on Ariana three times? DO YOU REALLY THINK LVP WAS SURPRISED BY THE NEWS ABOUT THE AFFAIR? WILL THIS BRING ALL THE ORIGINAL WOMEN BACK TOGETHER?