Woman defends for leaving sister’s children in childfree wedding: ‘Unhinged’

Internet commentators defended a medical student who left her sister’s children at a wedding meant specifically for adults.

In a viral Reddit post published on r/AmITeA**hole, Redditor u/LogosH434 (aka Original Poster or OP) said she was unexpectedly stuck with three kids and described the heated fallout of her decision to have the kids to bring back to her mother.

Captioned: “[Am I the a**hole] for dropping my sister’s kids at the childless wedding she attended?” The post has garnered nearly 25,000 upvotes and 3,500 comments since Oct. 8.

“My free time is very limited and I have many, many commitments,” OP began. “My sister … has 3 children, all under 10, and she often expects me to babysit … at random times and at very short notice.”

The original poster went on to explain that her sister was recently scheduled to attend a childfree wedding, saying she was surprised to learn she would be responsible for the children during the wedding and insisted she could not look after them.

The original poster also said she was forced to take the children, much to her dismay.

“I had to study for my upcoming exam, but the next thing I knew the kids were with me [doorstep] and she was back in the car,” the OP wrote. “I was so mad I couldn’t handle it.

“I decided to get dressed 30 minutes later and take the kids right to where their parents were,” OP continued. “My sister was shocked. She started yelling after me, but I quickly got in the car and drove off.

“She sent [a] a couple of messages unhinging me and calling a ‘f**king b**ch’ for putting her in that situation and embarrassing her in front of her friends,” OP added. “Her husband called later… [and] scolded me and said it wouldn’t hurt if I kept the kids for a few hours, then said how disappointed he was and how selfish and petty I was.”

For some parents, childless weddings mean inconvenience and additional childcare costs.

For others, child-free weddings are an opportunity to relax without worries and without the endless list of parenting responsibilities.

Adults-only weddings are also growing in popularity, and according to Alexis Eliopoulos O’Mara, master wedding consultant and owner of Unique Weddings by Alexis, keeping children away can help reduce risks and costs on a couple’s big day.

“Another advantage for some couples is a dance floor without children [and] no chance of a child knocking over the wedding cake or tripping a server,” said Eliopoulos O’Mara news week. “This decision can also be seen as… cost saving to have fewer guests at the wedding.”

Despite the reduced risk of pitfalls, there are many parents who hate having to leave their children somewhere else to attend a wedding.

2019, The current parent Contributor Karen Pinchin called childless weddings “offensive” and said that banning children from attending robs a parent’s ability to make their own decision based on their own judgment.

“If you love and trust the people you invite to your wedding, then love and trust them to make the best decision for you on your big day,” Pinchin wrote. “By explicitly stating ‘adults only’ or ‘no children,’ these invitations dictate the terms and take away guests’ best judgment.”

Eliopoulos O’Mara echoed this opinion, noting that some parents would refuse to attend weddings if their children were not allowed. She also stressed that cordiality is essential, regardless of parents’ opinions on child-free weddings.

“Regardless of how someone feels about an adults-only reception, they should respect the wishes of the couple,” said Eliopoulos O’Mara. “Couples usually put a lot of effort into making that kind of decision.”

However, throughout the comments section of the viral Reddit post, Redditors continued to focus on the original poster and her sister, rather than the newly married couple.

“[Not the a**hole]!” Redditor u/Ducky818 wrote in the top comment of the post, which received more than 44,000 upvotes. “Your sister brought her children to your classes without prior consultation…she feels she is entitled to everyone else’s time and help Has.

“Hint: She isn’t,” they continued. “You didn’t do that to your sister. She did it to herself.”

Redditor u/EJ_1004, whose comment received more than 5,000 upvotes, offered a similar answer.

“They are extremely ruthless and they have the nerve to try to scold you,” they exclaimed. “They try to hold you responsible for the direct result of their own actions.”

“Your sister doesn’t respect your life and commitments because she genuinely thinks hers is more important,” added Redditor u/Impressive-Amoeba-97, receiving almost 2,500 upvotes.

“They probably had months to take care of the childcare…then ran away and got angry when they gave THEM THEIR children back,” interjected Redditor u/PrincessSnowflake495. “You have to learn, your time is limited… and suddenly you [were] forced into a situation that you neither planned nor agreed to.”

news week contacted u/LogosH434 for comment. We have not been able to verify the details of the case.