Commenters supported a woman who refused to share her bed with her brother-in-law after he climbed in while she babysat his children.
The Original Poster (OP), known as u/ThrowraMegan11, posted about the incident on Reddit’s Am I The A**hole forum, where it received more than 10,000 upvotes and 1,600 comments. You can find the post here.
Many people experience some sort of conflict with their in-laws, whether it’s a fight between them and their mother-in-law or communicating boundaries with their partner’s siblings.
A study published in the journal Evolutionary Psychological Science found that men and women experience more conflict with their in-laws than with their biological families.
Almost half of those surveyed said they had more conflicts with their mothers-in-law than with their birth mothers.
As Manhattan-based psychologist Greg Kushnick put it news week In May, one way to deal with a toxic family relationship is to define your own boundaries.
By making sure you know your own boundaries, you will be more aware of your own triggers and will be able to discern if a person is being manipulative or toxic.
Kushnick also recommends that individuals find healthy forms of communication when dealing with these family members, e.g. B. how they react to “toxic” comments or manipulations.
In the post, titled “AITA for refusing to share my bed with my BIL even though his children slept in it?” the 30-year-old woman said her older sister, 35, died two months ago.
The OP said she often helps her brother-in-law by watching her 3- and 5-year-old children at her house or by taking them to her home.
Recently the OP’s brother-in-law left the kids with her for the day and later asked if she could stay at her place.
“Of course I agreed. The kids and I fell asleep while reading a story,” the post reads. “Then I woke up at 1am to a noise. I opened my eyes and saw my BIL slowly climbing into bed.”
The woman said she “freaked out” and asked her brother-in-law what he was doing, but he tried to get her to calm down, saying he wanted to “connect with” her and the kids.
“It didn’t suit me… I was confused,” the post reads. “I asked him if he thought that was appropriate and he said again his kids are there so he doesn’t mind him being with them. I felt extremely uncomfortable.”
The OP got out of bed and asked him to leave the room, but he refused, saying she “can’t keep him away from his kids.”
“I told him I would bring the kids over to him in a minute. He eventually left,” the post said. He got the kids dressed and brought them home after calling what I was doing ‘unnecessarily cruel’ and ‘rude’.”
When the OP called the next day to check on the kids, he told her he was still upset and that they were trying to catch up on sleep after she “interrupted her sleep” by refusing to let him into her bed allow.
“I hung up and felt so many things at once. I told my mom and she said I had to apologize for how I acted towards my grieving BIL,” the post reads. “AITA for saying no?”
More than 1,600 users commented on the post, with many criticizing the woman’s brother-in-law for believing it was okay to climb into her bed without permission.
“NTA. You didn’t keep him away from his kids, you kept him from crawling into your bed while you slept,” one user commented. “I can understand everyone is going through a really tough time right now, so they might not understand what they did, but that doesn’t make you the vet here.”
“Absolutely not. This man is trying to slide straight into bed as if you were his dead wife/sister and he sees no problem with that,” commented another. “That’s not a mistake, that was a tactical move to see how far he can push your limits and see how much you allow in a vulnerable time (half asleep)… You were right about all the alarm bells ringing.”
“Grief makes people do weird things, but the second you said no, it should have been respected. This is extremely creepy,” commented another.
“So if I understand correctly, he sneaked into your house in the middle of the night and wanted to crawl into bed?” commented another. “Excuse me? On what planet is this acceptable behavior?”
news week contacted u/ThrowraMegan11 for comment. We have not been able to verify the details of the case.
Other viral posts
In another viral Reddit post, a man was supported for telling his neighbors about the “pervert” next door who was watching his wife in the backyard.
Commentators also praised a woman for refusing to let her brother-in-law sleep in her bed during the holidays, and another woman was shocked to discover her sister-in-law’s plan to get her a divorce.
If you have a similar family issue, let us know at email@example.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.
https://www.newsweek.com/woman-praised-calling-out-extremely-creepy-brother-law-1748065 Woman praised for snubbing her ‘extremely creepy’ brother-in-law