Woman slammed for using her ex’s money to fund her lifestyle

A man has found support online after revealing he was unknowingly funding his ex-wife’s lifestyle, and the internet is beating the woman and her daughter over the situation.

The now-viral post, titled “AITA for stop the funds,” has received 8,800 upvotes and 800 comments since it was shared on June 1. Redditor @throwdilemm shared the post with the Am I the A**hole subreddit. and eight years ago he found his wife cheating.

The original poster’s (OP) wife left him afterwards, and although he had shared custody of their children, who are now 21 and 19, they wanted to stay with their mother. Her father was fine with that as long as he could see her.

“I worked more and made a better income and covered all the extra expenses even after the youngest was 18,” the man explained. “I even paid for the college funds myself, despite a court order that both would pay equally. Besides tuition, I paid for all other expenses (car, expensive clothes, electronics, vacation, etc.), although after that for a while my daughter went almost without contact.”

His daughter texts him the amount and where to send it, and the OP obliges. But two weeks ago, his 19-year-old son showed up at his father’s door after not hearing from him for two months.

The OP’s son told him that his sister dropped out of college after a few months and that the OP had been “funding” his ex’s “lifestyle” and their new children all these years since her affair partner left after their third child .

The OP continued, “My daughter, like my son, used me to help her mother and her own lifestyle. When I found that out, I stopped the money train. Turns out neither my ex nor my daughter work and they used my cash to fund their lifestyle. Now they can be kicked out if I don’t keep paying. I don’t cut my son out when he comes in.”

According to Statista, there were 214.21 million unemployed worldwide in 2021. That number has declined since 2020, when the number of unemployed was 223.67 million.

In a comment to another user, the OP added that he offered his daughter to stay with him. “She only says on condition that her mother and half-siblings are also allowed,” the OP wrote. “She says they won’t stay here while my wife and two younger children are here.”

But that wasn’t all she wanted. “She wants me to rent her out or send her to my in-laws until I can help her and her mother get her life and financial situation back to how it was,” he continued. “I can not do that. It’s not fair to my wife and young children.” He added that she wants the OP to get them a smaller rental — one with five bedrooms.

smiling woman
A woman gets beat up for using her ex to fund her lifestyle. Here a smiling woman wearing a brown jacket.
THOMAS NORTH CUT/GETTY

Although the OP suggested family therapy, his daughter says she will forgive him if he starts paying for things again. “She says I owe it to her mother since we were previously married to take care of her other three children until they come of age,” the OP said. “I don’t think it’s my responsibility at all. Especially since I did it for so many years when they weren’t my kids.”

As for the OP’s son, he now lives with his father and has been told that he can live there for free and that he also gets an allowance. This fall, however, he must have a part-time job or go back to school.

It turns out his son had a fight with his ex when she wanted him to “ask for an increase in monthly payments,” and the OP’s son “felt bad about it and felt it was time to do it.” to tell him”.

The OP’s daughter has been texting him more than 40 messages a day “begging” for money as they cannot pay next month’s rent on a six-bedroom house.

“She came down to me but refuses to be under the same roof with my wife,” he added. “So she wanted me to go with her to discuss the matter further at a restaurant. I told her to either speak to me at my house or not to speak to me at all.”

Also, the OP revealed that his ex’s boyfriend had left almost four years ago. He was unaware that he was “hardly” working,” arguing, “Seems like I’m funding everyone’s lifestyles.”

People are overwhelmingly siding with the OP and beating up his ex for using his money to support her lifestyle and daughter. One Redditor, who doesn’t think the man is wrong, pointed out that his daughter is grown and she “chosen to lie and steal” from him.

“You are not responsible for your ex or their children,” they said. “There are these things called jobs that most people get to make money and support themselves. Starbucks and Trader Joe’s pay well.”

One Redditor called the daughter and her mother “big assholes,” and they didn’t stop there with their thoughts on the matter.

“Your ex was a cheat boy and your daughter is apologizing and thinks you owe her and her nasty mother,” they wrote. “You’re both gold diggers and you played for a chump. I’m glad you found out about her deception and the fact that you supported her affair partner only adds insult to the hurt.”

Another user didn’t mince words and chose NTA or not the asshole as their verdict. “And the damn boldness of these women is unfathomable,” they added. “You want your wife and children to move out so they can move in? are you high I think it’s high time they applied and learned to support themselves.”

One Redditor thinks the OP’s daughter and his ex are “so damn selfish,” and they even added that they’re “sure” he could sue them if he wanted to.

“If they try to fight you about it, I’d let them know they’re lucky you’re not suing them,” they said. “I’m so mad at your daughter for thinking her choices are a good way to live her life.”

Another user thinks the OP should help his son further as he came to him and confessed. “Your ex got you dirty and reaped the benefits beyond need,” they wrote. The user added: “They are adults, they have to find out for themselves. You have supported your children throughout their lives and done your part.”

Advice came as to what the OP should do in the situation. “No NTA,” said one user. “Your daughter is grown up. your wife too. They lied and basically stole from you.

One user thinks the OP should continue to support his son, but they advised him to “take the measurements to make sure the money goes where it’s meant to go”. “What your ex-wife and daughter have done is horrific,” they added. “You made your bed, now you have to sleep in it.”

news week reached out to Redditor @throwdilemm for the comment.

This isn’t the only viral moment involving families. The internet was ripped about a stepmother picking up her drunken stepson from a party. A woman was supported for tricking her in-laws into eating her food. The internet also defended a mother who locked her 10-year-old’s bedroom door.

https://www.newsweek.com/woman-slammed-using-exs-money-fund-lifestyle-1712398 Woman slammed for using her ex’s money to fund her lifestyle

Rick Schindler

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