Woman who made her ‘favorite’ pasta with mushrooms gets spanked when her boyfriend hates her
A woman has been criticized for regularly making her ‘favorite pasta’ with chicken and mushrooms, even though her boyfriend hates the taste of mushrooms.
The woman, u/throwawayaccount4157, shared her story with the popular Reddit forum r/AmITeA******, where she received 5,200 upvotes and 2,300 comments for her post.[Am I the A******] for cooking mushroom noodles if my [boyfriend] do not like?”
The original poster (OP) begins by admitting that the problem is “something pretty small that kind of blows up”. She says she and her boyfriend, both 30, recently moved in together and have split all chores, including cooking – one day she cooks, the next he cooks.
However, her boyfriend hates mushrooms. Though he’s not allergic and she says “he’ll eat it if he has to,” she otherwise avoids the ingredient whenever possible. The OP says she’s the exact opposite, and one of her favorite dishes is a chicken and mushroom pasta dish.
“Of course I don’t make it every time, but when I make it [boyfriend] usually eats a small amount or makes something else. He said he didn’t like it so I’m trying to make it less frequent,” she wrote, adding that she usually makes the dish once or twice a week.
After making the chicken and mushroom pasta again, she says her boyfriend was “kinda crazy” and reminded her that he hated mushrooms and that when it was her turn to cook, she should do something else .
“I replied that I like it, but he said I should have put some away before adding the mushrooms or just left plain noodles for him. I said if he has a problem like this he can always do something else,” she wrote.
When asked why she doesn’t make a version with mushrooms for her and another for him, she said the sauce base would have to be divided into two pans. She added that she has to cook the mushrooms in the sauce for the flavor to come through.
She said that when it’s her boyfriend’s turn to cook, he doesn’t make dishes she hates and that he offered another compromise, which she declined.
“I’m way better at making pasta dishes than anything else, so it’s more convenient for me to stick with it, but I also do other things. My boyfriend is a much better cook than me and he offered to cook for us every night. But the problem with that is he wants to trade other chores for cooking and I don’t want to do that,” OP wrote in an additional comment.
Although food is the source of many of life’s pleasures, it can also cause strife in households. For example, a couple living with in-laws struggled when rising energy bills prompted the in-laws to use the oven only once a day – and only by the worst cook in the household. In another story, a woman’s daughter decided her father’s new wife made better food, but when she complained she was told to cook her own. A man was called a “toddler” because he let his mother cook for him every day and refused whatever his wife cooked.
Dianne Grande, Ph.D. spoke with news week about the situation and urges the OP to find a compromise that suits her.
“It’s never a good idea to ignore a partner’s repeated requests, whether it’s about food preferences, room temperature, or spending vs. saving preferences,” Grande said. “Consider being more flexible in sharing food prep tasks. Expecting a perfectly even split of homework is generally not a good plan. Both individuals benefit when they are willing to do more than their ‘fair share,'” she added.
Grande also suggested making the mushroom noodles once or twice a month, rather than every week.
Redditors also took the OP to task for making the mushroom dish so frequently.
“[You’re the A******] because you take turns cooking for each other. He’s right that there’s no reason you couldn’t have something set aside for him before adding the mushrooms. It’s easy to do and shows that you care about your partner,” u/These-Buy-4898 wrote in the top-rated comment, with over 17,200 upvotes. “I can guarantee you’d be furious if he intentionally made every other meal like he knew you hated. Secretly hate yours [boyfriend] or are you just completely egocentric? Wow.”
“I happen to love mushrooms, but THAT!!! I made chili for dinner last night, a dish known for having a bit of spiciness and spiciness [mother-in-law] HATES spicy stuff. Won’t even touch the mildest heat. So I put in everything not spicy [ingredients] and only half to a quarter of cayenne and paprika, etc., just enough to get a feel for the taste and smell. About 30 minutes before dinner, I scooped her portion into a small saucepan and added the remaining condiments to the main course. what did it cost me A moment to consider her and the need to wash the little pot I put her portion in,” u/Liathnian wrote.
“My mom is sweet and always keeps tomatoes aside for salads, and when I was vegetarian she kept a meatless portion or made something simple and meatless for me. It wasn’t too difficult and it meant/means a lot to me. I can’t understand why anyone wouldn’t want to make someone they love happy,” u/beenyolk wrote.
“[You’re the A******]. I’m sorry but that’s a lot of dishes that I love and my fiancé despises and do you know how it works? If I’m cooking something he doesn’t like, I make sure to make something for him that he likes to eat, because that’s what you do when you love someone more than everyone else, you spoil them,” wrote u/ FrenchieLittleMinx.
news week contacted u/throwawayaccount4157 for a comment. We have not been able to verify the details of this case.
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https://www.newsweek.com/woman-bashed-making-favorite-mushroom-pasta-when-boyfriend-hates-it-1759888 Woman who made her ‘favorite’ pasta with mushrooms gets spanked when her boyfriend hates her